Sunday, April 17, 2011

You Make Me Feel Like

I’ve been crammed into a flimsy
box of uneasiness
flapping at the insides—
pecking away to make holes
to let the pressure come
bursting out
are the black crows
only to shy away from the brilliant
charlatan that you are.
It can’t be helped:
I’ll have to make my home
amidst this tumultuous nest.

>>Feedback is welcome!

1 comment:

  1. Great fire, terrific imagery and, best of all, the abstract blending of image with feeling "box of uneasiness." Since that's your best line it MIGHT be a better title--but I DO like the title as is as well. I would take out the inconsistent punctuation--all of it as I don't think that you need it. Instead of "the insides" say what: "its" "the cardboard" "the box's." Amidst is like among=one in a group of many so I think you need "inside" or "trapped in" or?